John Adams, the second president of the United States, said: “From all that I had read of history and government of human life and manners, I had drawn this conclusion, that the manners of women were the most infallible barometer to ascertain the degree of morality and virtue of a nation.” —Dee Jepsen, Women Beyond Equal Rights (Waco: Word, 1984), quoted in James Robinson, Attack on the Family (Wheaton, IL: Tyndale House Publishers, 1981), 33.

The role of women in society cannot be filled by any other. Women uniquely influence the family and the community. Typically, they manage the home, provide the meals, select the clothing, chauffer the children, volunteer at school, church, clubs—the list is almost endless. Over ninety percent of women also work a part- or full-time job.

Balancing all the roles a woman embraces is not easy. Learning how to set priorities and how to say “no” is a necessity. Women simply cannot, and should not, do everything that comes their way. One role they must embrace is raising their children. 

Choice of Clothing
Another area women have a unique opportunity to influence others in is through their clothing choices. Unfortunately, many have followed the trends set by the media. Fashion continually pushes the boundaries of what is acceptable with little regard for the impact on women (and on men). Super thin models, scantily dressed and airbrushed to appear flawless, create an unrealistic ideal of what it means to be beautiful. These images fill the fashion magazines and the minds of our girls, resulting in a loss of self-esteem and the belief that they must dress and look the same if they are to be “pretty” and acceptable in our society.

Unfortunately, many mothers have also yielded to the media pressure. They shop where their daughters shop, and wear what they wear, affirming that being young and sexy is the goal. Modesty has all but evaporated from most closets and feminine bodies.

A woman who knows how to use fashion to dress appropriately for her age, to enhance her body type and coloring, to be fashionable and yet modest, is a joy to all who meet her. The truth is, a woman is always more interesting when she leaves some things to the imagination. A beautifully groomed and dressed woman is a gift to all who meet her and provides an excellent role model for others.

Good Manners
Another area women have an opportunity to influence others in is by the practice and use of good manners. A child learns what they live. A child who is raised in a home where good manners are modeled and valued will always benefit. 

Unfortunately, the media has also set the tone for much of today’s behavior. Television and movies portray children and teens mocking adults and being disrespectful while viewers laugh and enjoy popcorn. The family dinner table has been replaced with drive-through menus and playgrounds. Gifts are expected, and thank-you cards are neglected.

Women uniquely set the standard for the family and for society. They lead others by their dress and behavior. Let’s lead our children to excellence! If you lack the skills you need, seek opportunities to learn them.

Civility Tip – Body Management
You demonstrate kindness and respect for yourself and others through how you manage your body, appearance, and behavior.

1. Maintain a healthy weight.
2. Exercise regularly.
3. Be well groomed.
4. Dress appropriately for the situation.
5. Practice good manners.